IC Inbox - Ryslig

[blap_blap]

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[bent_the_world]

I think some of it's hair.

[Korra lifts one of the long, ombre toned bits and shrugs.]

I was a troll for a while, and it was the same thing. The weird long, long hair or fur or whatever on my arms and legs and at my hairline. And these.

[She gestures to the mineral veins that run through her now. At least she's had all this stuff before, it's just weird having it and her werebear stuff.]

But I am definitely the furriest person you know.

[blap_blap]

I should get you a trophy or something. 'Furriest Person in Ryslig'. Oh, or would you be Best in Show?

[Not that there were bear-person competitions or anything. Though that did raise the question of what would happen if someone entered, like, a werewolf into a dog competition. Would they be disqualified? Is there a special category for animal monsters? There are many questions.]

Seriously, though, I'm sure I'm not the first person to say this but the Fog God is kind of a bitch? Like, why all this? [He gestures down at himself.] I look like the big awful vault monster that I had to kill. Plus bonus eyeball hand, like, why.

[His drink comes. He just drinks it in one, do not pass Go, do not collect $200.]

[bent_the_world]

Wow. I'm more bear than dog, so....no, no it would not be Best in Show.

[Korra laughs and signals for the current bartender to just keep them well liquefied.]

Oh yeah, I don't like either of them and I don't get why so many people throw in with them, but it's their monster life, I guess. You really did get extremely fucked up this time, I am sorry.

Does...um...they hand eye hurt?

https://i.redd.it/4qzl1b6dd8l31.jpg

[justbeingknife]

I found a poster

< mrhandsome69 >

[blap_blap]

oh

oh my god

where did you find that oh my god why is that HERE oh my god i’m just

i’m going to die that’s it this is what kills me

[justbeingknife]

Over at the museum? Looks like they went through a renovation.

If ya want, I could buy up all the others.

[ The clerks would probably look at him like he was some kind of freak, but ]

There's, uh. Kind of a pile of them.

[blap_blap]

i’m going to have to burn down the museum

just

set everything on fire with me inside it that’s fine this is fine

oh my god

[justbeingknife]

A fire can be arranged but I'd rather ya not be inside when it happens.

I take it this's legit, then? Man, these names...

[ who the hell was Harder than Hard Productions... ]

Listen, do you wanna meet up or something? I got questions, but I'm kinda not even sure what I want to ask.

[blap_blap]

im pretty sure that all i want to do right now is walk into the freaking ocean

i still can’t swim so that’s fine ill just sink like a dumb beefy rock great okay im just going to go yeet myself into the sea from whence my stupid ass came okay good plan

all the great oceans can’t clean macbeths hands or whatever but they can sure as hell grant me the sweet release of death from this nightmare

[justbeingknife]

[ oh my god, tim ]

Sorry, but your plan's flawed.

You'd only get a few days' respite or whatever before ya returned from the grave, fresh-faced and ready to take on the world.

[blap_blap]

nope the world can go fuck itself there's an unlimited number of times that i can toss myself into the ocean that's the great thing about the ocean its a terrifying deathtrap full of sharks and threshers and seaweed is seaweed actually dangerous or is it just gross

i feel dizzy i think i need to lie down

[justbeingknife]

I'm pretty sure it's just slimy.

[ Although who knew, people were always coming up with new and exciting ways to kill themselves, maybe it was possible to bumblelord one's way into strangulation at the hands of rogue seaweed. ]

Look, I'll buy up the rest of these, and then I'll come over with a nice coffee and croissant or something.

You're not gonna actually pass out, right?

[blap_blap]

i dunno its kind of up in the air right now

its fine i'm just having a panic attack or something ill just lay here until the feeling of impending doom passes or i die whichever comes first

[justbeingknife]

Uh huh. You stay put.

[ It wasn't long before Majima found his way to the house; he'd never actually been there, but with a general idea of where it was and his werewolf nose, it wasn't too hard to track things down.

There was a knock on the door. Also, the smell of a couple of cafe purchases. ]

Hey.

[ His voice was a warm lick in the cool autumn air temperatures. There were the ends of some poster rolls sticking out of one side of the paper bag he was carrying. ]

[blap_blap]

[By the time Majima showed up, Tim was like, 80% done with his panic attack? Probably. He was done with it enough to be able to actually be upright and make it to the door and open it without hyperventilating or something. It's fine. This is fine.]

[He still definitely looked like a guy who'd spent the last fifteen or twenty minutes in the middle of a panic attack. His hair was a mess, face kind of pale, he was technically dressed but not in anything nice and there was cat hair on his pants. Definitely not how he'd want to look when his boyfriend was coming over. And, to a keen werewolf nose, he probably reeked a little like he'd been marinading in whatever anxiety mixed lightly with cat smelled like. Eau de Panic Attack, the latest fragrance by Timothy Lawrence.]

...Hi.

[Tim wanted to look literally anywhere else but at those poster rolls. Of all things, why did that have to show up here? Did the Fog God do this because he said he'd sue her?]

Oh, uh. Come in?

[He moved out of the doorway so that Majima could, like, actually walk through it. The house itself was done up in what was considered modern for this time period, a lot of metal and plastic and clean lines. The closest that Jack could get to doing the house up in Hyperion fashion when they were stuck in fantasy 1950 or whatever.]

Sorry, I'm. I'm kind of a mess.

[justbeingknife]

[ Majima stepped into the doorway, put down the bag, but he didn't walk past Tim. Instead, he swept one arm over the man's shoulders and the other around his back, pulling Tim into a hug that probably pressed some of that fluffy werewolf fur into his cheek. ]

You okay?

[ Sure, he'd figured Tim might be embarrassed, but he hadn't actually sent that first message expecting a full-out anxiety attack.

His boyfriend smelled like cat. There was cat hair on him. It wasn't Majima's cat hair, though, and in fact he was picking up an animal odor -- no wait bad time to get distracted. ]

[blap_blap]

[Tim leaned into the hug, settling some of his weight on Majima and pressing his face into that dense werewolf fluff. Nothing like smothering yourself in some fur when you felt like yeeting yourself into the abyss.]

I mean, I haven't walked into the ocean yet, so.

[It was a low bar, but Tim's setting small goals right now. He would have been perfectly content to pretend that Handsome Jack Tames Pandora had never happened and he'd never have to deal with anyone he personally knew finding out about how he'd starred in a Jack-themed porno. Because there was so much to unpack there, just the whole concept of him having to do a porno while pretending to be his asshole boss, and it was probably better to just throw away the whole suitcase.]

I just. I kind of thought that would never show up here? Because why would it.

[blap_blap]

Hey, who says we can't have a Best in Show for bears? That's like, discrimination. We should recognize excellence in bears too.

[Equal representation or whatever. Bring in the bear shows, let the judges determine which bear is the best at fishing or whatever.]

It doesn't hurt, exactly? But I don't like to have it open because looking through it is just... weird. I'm not sure what I see with it, but it's not anything normal.

[It's fine, he's probably seeing like a different dimension or something. That's. That's fine.]

[justbeingknife]

[ Majima made a low, rumbling sort of 'hmm' noise, but there really was no one answer. Because fate? Because Fog God? Because nothing said "welcome to your new monster life" like a haunted museum dredgin' up things you'd rather forget? ]

[ Tim's weight felt comforting -- kind of like having a warm weighted blanket draped on top of him. ]

Sorry. Guess I should've just gotten rid of 'em without sayin' anything. I thought you'd want to know.

[ Of course, this plan would probably involve sending someone by on a routine basis to make sure more posters didn't show up in stock, but that was what the Nishidas of the world were for. ]

[blap_blap]

No, it's, it's fine, if you hadn't told me, someone else probably would've found it.

[Better to hear it from his boyfriend than from some rando? God. Why was this his life.]

God, Jack would've found it and then I'd probably have come home one day to find the stupid thing framed and hung up in the living room.

[Because Jack would want a framed poster of his porno, even if he wasn't the person actually starring in said porno because he was too lazy, too busy, or had too much of a dad bod to want to. Or maybe because he would've had to take too many dick rocks to be able to actually film the porn part.]

And it would just give him ideas, I really don't want to have to deal with that.

[justbeingknife]

That does sound shitty.

[ He'd really have to introduce his new assistant to Tim sometime. Maybe later. For now, he'd brush the back of his hand against Tim's neck. That dark brown hair was a mess, but Majima was a little more concerned with his memory of the last time Tim had a bout of panic; Tim had pulled at his hair hard enough that Majima had been worried the man would tear it out. ]

I did bring that coffee, but I got some tea, too. Want some? [ You know. Because coffee seemed like maybe a bad idea after an attack. ]

You can hold it, and I'll just hang out for a while.

[blap_blap]

[It was fine, Tim was used to going from a panic attack to chugging coffee, he'd been a poor college student. That was basically midterms and finals in a nutshell, going from panicking to downing coffee to stay awake for more studying, then more panicking.]

[And if he'd been pulling at his hair-- hard to tell, there were some bits that were sticking up, but his hair sometimes just did that on its own, too-- he wasn't doing it anymore, at least.]

Yeah, I think I'd like that? If you aren't busy or anything. [Tim wouldn't have blamed him if he had better things to do than sit around and wait for him to get his shit together.] And, uh. You did say that you had, y'know. Questions.

[Before Majima had showed up, though, Tim had been upstairs, laying face down on his bed with a cat on his back, because Jay Catsby gravitated towards the warmest location in the house. Since that was usually Tim and Tim was clearly not going back upstairs anytime soon, there was a protesting meow from the top of the stairs and the sound of a large cat making his way down. Neither panic attacks nor werewolf boyfriends were going to prevent him from having a warm lap to sit on.]

[justbeingknife]

I'm never too busy for you.

[ It was both stupidly sappy and wholly true, and in his embarrassment Majima fished a lidded, steaming cup of tea out from his things and pressed it into Tim's hands. Maybe that would distract him enough so Tim didn't notice how sheepish he was acting.

The smell of chamomile wafted up from the vent, which was apparently what you got when you asked a barista for something for someone who was upset.

Meanwhile, Majima glanced up at the meow. Ah ha. ]

So this's the cat in question. He's... wow, what've you been feedin' him?

[blap_blap]

[That was a really sweet thing to say? Majima was really sweet, and he'd even brought some tea, and Tim didn't know a whole lot about hot leaf water but he was pretty sure that the chamomile stuff was for when you were upset. Gosh, what a good boyfriend.]

Thanks. [He wrapped his hands around the warm cup and probably looked like a freaking doofus because he was smiling at some chamomile tea.] I'm really glad you're here, y'know?

[In the meanwhile, Jay Catsby wandered his way over, ostensibly to check out this new weird person who was standing in his house. He bunted up against Tim's legs, a usual habit for him, then went over to Majima, stood on one of his feet, and gave his leg a sniff.]

Would you believe it if I said he was like this when I found him?

[As the kids would say, an absolute unit. A real chonker.]

[Said chonker decided that Majima was good enough, but unacceptably smelled like wolfman and therefore needed to have a cat face rubbed all over his shins.]

[justbeingknife]

Me, too.

[ While Tim grinned at his tea, Majima could smile stupidly back at his boyfriend, the usual sharp set of his features softening. He'd always been something of a sentimental type, but it was a quality he reined in -- couldn't have a soft heart and a career as a gangster, not working under someone like Shimano. Out here, though, there were no such concerns, and Tim was just so goddamn sweet.

It made him want to give Tim those things that apparently no one had bothered to. Treat him right. ]

Do you, uh, have anywhere to sit down?

[ That was it -- something to do that wasn't standing here leaking feelings all over the foyer. He didn't even resist while Jay Catsby covered him in cat hair. ]