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[Tim ran his tongue over the teeth in his top jaw, and it felt like... things were moving around up there. Which was both super disturbing to feel and also pretty uncomfortable in general; teeth usually didn't move once you got your adult set, and shoving them around to make room for something new wasn't fun.]

[And there was definitely a pair of teeth moving in to the vacancy that were sharper than the last ones.]

Why am I lothing my teef?

[And he can't even talk right, god. The new teeth that moved in were a little bigger than the old ones, and a little longer, so talking around them was weird.]

[When Majima joined him in the tub, though, he opened his mouth to show him the new additions, like he wanted. A pair of brand new incisors, but ones that were sharp and pointy and looked like they'd be much better at puncturing than tearing.]

How'th it look?

Uh. Okay. Congratulations, you've got fangs.

[ What kind of fangs, however, was the question. Majima stoppered the tub and hung the showerhead up, freeing up his hands so he could lean in for a closer examination. ]

Do minotaurs have those? Seems kinda out of character.

[ But there were deer with fangs, right? So maybe there were cattle, too? Majima put a finger out to test the point of one gleaming tooth, and came away with a drop of blood beading up from the pad of his index finger. This he showed off to Tim. Sharp! ]

If this's permanent, it's gonna make kissing a little more complicated.

Uh, I'm pretty thure that fangth aren't part of the minotaur package.

[God, how long was he going to be doing this. End his suffering, just shoot him now.]

[Tim looked at the dark red bead on Majima's finger and had the weirdest urge to, like. Lick it? Yeah, that was definitely weird, but maybe he was just being weird today. A lot had happened, he was probably just still thrown by it. It's fine, that was. That was fine.]

I'll try to be careful. [He definitely didn't want some stupid new dental work to mess up his ability to kiss his boyfriend. That should be illegal.] Why am I getting thith now? I thould be done getting new thingth.

[He shouldn't get anything new unless he--]

[Oh.]

Oh.

Edited 2019-12-01 22:04 (UTC)

[ Majima got the sudden and almost irresistible urge to laugh. It wasn't Tim's fault; god knew the guy had everything and the kitchen sink thrown at him this past week. But the sight of this big old beef slab sitting in a bathtub and lisping his discontent was honestly fucking endearing, and he was relieved his boyfriend was in one weird cowman piece and in the end, Majima wrapped his arms around Tim and smushed his face into the man's neck. ]

"Oh"?

[ Look. Tim had created his monster, and apparently he was going to have to deal with the cuddly consequences. ]

[Tim wrapped his newly formed beefy arms around Majima, hugging him back while his boyfriend buried his face in his neck. It was great just to be able to hold him again; he hadn’t appreciated how good it was until he couldn’t do it anymore.]

[While he was dealing with the cuddle monster of his own making, Tim was also coming to the realization that he might have made a different monster, too. Played monster mash with himself and maybe didn’t get the result that he’d wanted.]

I asketh Mana for thomething.

[It had seemed like a good idea at the time—exchange Monopoly money for a less horrible feeding method. Now... not so much.]

I wanted a way to eat that didn’t involve killing thomeone?

[ A beat. ]

...you're a vampcow?

[ Wait was there a snazzier way to say that? ] A cowpire?

[ At first, Majima wasn't even looking at Tim, his voice was muffled by Tim's shoulder but this fucker was totally smiling. Now he was pulling back a little, flashing a little fang himself in this dumb grin as he traced the blood-tipped pad of his index finger down over the swell of Tim's exposed pec. ]

But that's good news, right? You did get what ya asked for. [ There was warmth in that smile, too -- happiness, and a sense of genuine relief that it wasn't some new magical bullshit from the fog above. ] And those fangs look good on ya.

Edited 2019-12-02 05:12 (UTC)

The Nothtferatmoo.

[Deadpan delivery. If he was going to be the butt of these cow vampire jokes, he damn well was going to have the best one. And Majima didn’t always have a monopoly on terrible puns, but most of the time.]

[Majima’s smile was kind of pointy, too— he’d gotten used to fangs, Tim supposed, so surely he could, too. A little less easy to get used to, though, was the warm, sticky drag of that finger down his chest and the smell of blood in the room. It didn’t smell as gross as it should.]

I mean, I gueth? I wanted to do that energy thing, but if I’m careful I could probably do the blood thing and not kill anyone. [So it would do, but it wasn’t ideal. Tim frowned, and the tips of his fangs poked out over his lower lip.] Thankth. Not exactly the aeththetic I was going for, but I’ll work with it.

Edited 2019-12-02 05:29 (UTC)

Yeah. Maybe take small sips?

[ That could have been a pun, but Majima was talking about feeding before Tim got distractingly hungry. He considered the man for a moment or two, and those protruding fangs. God. Leave it to Tim to turn into a vampire with an overbite. ]

You can practice on me, if ya want.

[ Maybe it was actually a bad idea to immediately offer himself as tribute for a newly-minted nosferatmoo. Maybe that. At the same time

Majima couldn't say he wasn't curious. ]

i'd say i can let myself in but you probably don't want to leave the door unlocked for that....

and i hope you like adventure books because that's all i have.

that and kids books.

i'm not reading you kids books.

[Tim was going to breeze on past that pun and pay attention to the important part of this conversation, the part where Majima offered to be a Capri Sun for Ryslig’s newest cowpire. That sounded like a bad idea? Like a terrible idea, like an idea that ended in tears and exsanguinated lovers.]

[‘Practice’ on him, like it was massage technique or something, not sticking his fangs in to drink his sweet werewolf blood.]

Uh. Is that a good idea? I might really hurt you.

[So therefore he should do it to someone who he wasn’t in love with first. But on the other hand... he was kind of hungry, and Majima always looked good enough to eat.]

[ Majima's response was to put a hand up to Tim's cheek, rubbing at a stray spot of blood with the back of a fuzzy hand. ]

I trust you.

[ He probably also should have tried to find out ahead of time whether this was going to hurt, or whether vampires had some kind of anesthetic ability that would make Tim a big old cowsquito. Love made him stupid, apparently. ]

yeah... for obvious reasons

but hey who says i wouldn't like kids books

i like detective frog as much as the next guy. it's a classic!!

no that's for MY sanity, not yours.

you're getting books about inexplicably shirtless dudes finding hidden temples and fighting hordes of random wildlife in the jungle.

one of them has a cover with a guy swinging a swordfish at upright walking turtles with giant teeth, that's GOT to be good.

Uh. I mean. If you're sure?

[Tim still had some doubts, but, like. Majima was an adult. He could decide if he wanted to get bitten by a cowpire, that was his prerogative or whatever. Who was Tim to deny him if he wanted to find out what it was like to be a cowsquito's juice box?]

[Love made them both a pair of dumbasses, apparently.]

Do, uh. Do you want me to go for the neck? Or is that too obvious? I, uh, I guess I could find another place to bite?

[ Majima tilted his head to the side, baring the long line of his neck and shoulder before his skin disappeared into the warm expanse of white fur. ]

Neck's fine, just don't nick an artery. You know where those are, right?

[ Was it wrong that he wanted Tim to go for the neck? Probably. But look, Tim was a big, strapping nosferatmoo, so maybe Majima could be forgiven for his fascination. Long fingers wrapped gently under Tim's jaw and tipped his chin forward. Closer. ]

C'mere.

[Majima drew him closer, guiding his face towards the warm, smooth column of his throat like he wasn’t a monster with newly minted puncturing fangs. The offer was a little too much for him to resist, at least after Majima had said yes so many times, anyway. He very clearly wanted this and Tim was kind of hungry.]

I, um, yeah. I think so.

[Pretty sure he knew where the big ones were, anyway. Tim put his face into Majima’s neck, first just kissing it— almost as an apology. This might hurt, after all, and Tim really hated the idea of hurting his boyfriend, even if the guy had asked for it.]

[Then, he opened his mouth and there was the soft scrape of sharp teeth on skin, and Tim bit down.]

[The feeling of yielding flesh under his teeth was satisfying, but not more satisfying than the warm pulse of blood that ran over his tongue, salty-sweet and lovely. And the bite, at least, of the Nosferatmoo was a kinder one— much more pleasant than painful, and probably paired nicely with being held in big, beefy arms.]

[ Kisses were nice. They were quite nice, in fact, so when Tim touched his lips to the surface of Majima's skin, the werewolf responded by looping his arms around his boyfriend's beefy neck. ]

Oh.

[ The press of the man's fangs did hurt a little -- a brief sting was the way Majima would describe it. But it certainly wasn't enough to put him off. Nor was the sharp scent of blood. In fact, the Nosferatmoo's embrace, combined with the heat of the bath water, felt so strangely good that Majima leaned into it with a sigh, the tips of his fingers tracing little shapes over the back of Tim's swole shoulders. ]

Tim...

[ The name came as a murmur, inviting and affectionate. ]

i mean look buddy you def seem to get fucked at a higher percentile than the average doof but id say theres always gonna be SOME chance of that
but if the option is like
the ultimate fuck versus maybe getting fucked 50% less you just have to shoot your shot
on the upside looks like people might not even leave here ever so
you might just never have to go home

hey that works too

i’m always here for shirtless dudes running around being handsome and muscley

so yeah let’s do it. i’m down for sword swinging dudes vs bipedal turtles with oversized dentistry

then let me introduce you to a whole new genre purely about buff men being brave and dumb in exotic locations.

okay give me like an hour and i'll be there!

[Well, Majima sure seemed to like the kiss of the Nosferatmoo, going from that sweet sigh and the way he traced his fingers over Tim’s shoulders. The noises he made were encouraging, and Tim moved a hand to the back of Majima’s neck to angle his head better and really go for it. Bite down into pliant tissue and get another wave of heat over his tongue, another taste of him.]

[Everything about it felt good— the willing, unresisting body in his arms, the blood running down his throat, the way he could feel a faint pulse in his jaw. There was some instinct that told him to shift his bite to feel it better, up higher on his neck and deeper, but that—]

[Tim loosened his bite. That was probably enough of that. Majima was his boyfriend, not a steak. This was just a little sampler.]

[When he pulled back, there were two clear punctures on his neck, surrounded by redness that would probably eventually bruise. It stopped bleeding quickly enough, but there was still a little slip of blood that ran down his collar, and Tim couldn’t help licking it up.]

[ Turned out, Majima might as well have been wearing a skimpy negligee, because he really liked this whole Nosferatmoo thing? Or at least, he'd enjoy being ravished by this particular Nosferatmoo. He groaned as Tim bit deeper into him, at the feeling of hot blood and the strangely pleasant sink of fangs into his neck. At some point, his fingers lost that part of their coordination that allowed them to make coherent shapes, and Majima occupied himself instead into drawing himself closer into Tim's beefy embrace.

When his boyfriend let go, there was still the warm swipe of Tim's tongue over his skin; Majima stroked the soft, velvety fur behind Tim's ear and gave his temple a kiss. ]

Wow. Really enjoyed that, huh?

I, uh. Is it weird to say that you taste good?

[Probably, but Majima was a snack in both the literal and metaphorical ways. That was also kind of a problem, though-- he tasted so good that if Tim was hungry enough, he'd be worried that he might do some real damage. Get his teeth into an important vessel or something and accidentally bleed out his boyfriend.]

[Prudence would probably say that he should keep his eating and his relationships separate. That also was probably the exact opposite of what they were going to do, because they both made terrible decisions.]

Did it hurt? You, um. It didn't seem like it was bad, but...

[How could it not hurt to have somebody's teeth in your neck?]

Only a little.

[ Great, now Majima was cuddling Tim, like the Nosferatmoo had actually kissed him instead of relieving him of a pint of the good stuff. ]

I guess it should hurt. But it's really only when your fangs first sink in. The rest actually feels pretty damn nice.

[ He reached out to turn off the tap now that the water had risen to bath-height, then put his fingers up to touch the puncture marks. ]

Guess I'd still better cover up for a bit, huh? How're you feelin' now?

[So the kiss of the Nosferatmoo wasn't a painful one-- Tim wasn't exactly sure what to think about that. On one hand, he was glad that he didn't actually hurt Majima when he bit him, but on the other... there was something kind of awful in the idea that he could drain somebody and make them like it.]

[Also-- Majima was totally willing to let his cowpire boyfriend snack on him. That was probably concerning, too.]

I'm feeling better, I think? But that's a super low bar to pass.

[He'd literally regrown limbs and had his teeth fall out. Pretty much anything was better than that.]

We, uh. We should probably be careful, though? I could really hurt you with this whole vampire thing.

[And Majima might not even realize until it was too late, since there wasn't the appropriate pain response.]

IC Inbox - Ryslig

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< mrhandsome69 >

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fuck it, full cowpire trash

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< mrhandsome69 >

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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, TIMOTHY LAWRENCE. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 011.11.201.45 * mrhandsome69 has joined 011.11.201.45 <USERNAME> First sentence of message. <BANNED USER> SCREENED MESSAGE. UNSCREEN? Y/N -- sample for when you ban someone <USERNAME> First sentence of message. <USERNAME>** First sentence of message.