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[blap_blap]

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[justbeingknife]

Best decision I ever made.

[ Maybe, at first, it had been something of an impulse. Meet a nice guy, someone who pulled at the old heartstrings and could also benefit from company to keep at night.

Only that little tug had turned out to be part of a larger undercurrent. Now Majima could barely imagine his life without the man, and he sure as hell didn't want to. ]

And it ain't like I can say anything. I'm the one that took ya home.

[ Noble celibacy had never been Majima's thing; he liked sex, liked it even more when a certain beefy beau was involved. He planted a smooch now on Tim that was warm and familiar. There were little flecks of smooth scale on Majima's skin now, blue and silver and cream -- though why the fuck an octopus would have scales was a mystery. ]

[ He was beaming at Tim now, even though his hands were absolutely still sampling the swell of his husband's chest. There was only the briefest of pauses when Tim laughed, made his little admission...

and then it was on. A couple tentacles had to stick it out and make sure Majima didn't fall over, but the rest were suddenly at Tim's sides, his stomach, and the soles of his feet as the former-wolfman pounced. ]

[ A laugh escaped Majima as he mounted his multi-pronged tickle assault -- easy, warm, and free of even the hint of a shadow. ]

[blap_blap]

[Tim should know better, really, than to say something about how ticklish he was to a man with technically ten limbs. Granted, two of those were pretty preoccupied with his tits, but that was still in the general vicinity of his sides and could easily make the switch from appreciation to torture.]

[There was a moment, a heartbeat between when Tim was laughing and Majima was looking at him, and his laugh faltered and he said, apprehension dawning,] Hey--

[And then there were tentacles all over him, going for all the most sensitive spots-- his sides, his belly, those brand-new feet. He practically shrieked with unwilling laughter, squirmed and wriggled to try to get away from the unrelenting assault. It was a lot harder than it sounded, mostly because getting away from five or six tentacles was a very difficult feat and because Tim kept flinching every time they squiggled against a new ticklish spot.]

Oh oh stop it, Gorō, Gorō, I can't, I'm gonna-- [He says in between bouts of uncontrollable laughter. It is, as all tickled laughter is, slightly pained.] I can't breathe!

[And he was also pretty close to wiggling himself right off of the edge of the bed.]

[justbeingknife]

[ Majima would have said it wasn't possible to be any more in love with his new husband -- only this was too cute, a side of Tim that he'd only seen perhaps back during that snowball fight. Something in him wanted to envelop his lover, truss him up whole in a tangle of limbs and kiss him all over, at least until he went back to having two legs instead of ten arms.

He caught them both before Tim slid them over the edge, and then instead of tickling there was kissing. The brush of his lips over Tim's shoulders and nose and mouth as most of his tentacles went back to a gentle roll over the covers, only one teasing lightly over the catfishman's obliques. ]

You're adorable.

[ And Majima was more than happy to adore. The thin chain on which he'd strung his wedding ring rustled as his chest pressed against Tim's. ]

I love you.

[ He murmured, between smooches. Sorry, Tim. But you'd signed up for this cuddly octopus. ]

[blap_blap]

[Tim still had some residual giggles left even after Majima's tentacles stopped torturing him and he was instead being smothered in kisses. It's a significant improvement, Tim would much rather be kissed than die laughing from the relentless assault of his husband's calamari arms.]

[Majima leaned back from one of the kisses and Tim grabbed the chain that hung around his neck, using it to pull him in for another. Something a little longer, a little deeper.]

Love you, too.

[Always.]

Y'know, I'd meant to ask you before. [He touched the tentacle by his hip, a fond little pat.] What's it like, feeling with these things? Is it like it is with your hand, or are they super sensitive or something?

[justbeingknife]

[ Oh, yeah. That was the good stuff. Majima wrapped his human arms around Tim, the better to indulge in some smooches. It had been half a minute, and in the midst of it all a little noise of approval escaped his throat. Maybe it would have even been a reply if it hadn't been muffled by the exchange of tongue. ]

Uh... hmm. [ Majima cast a brief glance down at the indicated tentacle, although he absolutely didn't let go of Tim. ]

Yeah, I guess so. Only... I can kinda taste with the suckers, too. And smell.

[ Wait, was that why his tentacles seemed to prefer Tim? At least partially? It beat tasting floor, certainly, although Tim was also just Tim -- easy on the eyes and on the tentacles. If there was anything Majima would want to spend his time wrapped around, it was definitely the man he was in bed with now.

Also sorry Tim, guess your husband was just covered with tiny little demimouths. A deep sea eldritch abomination. ]

How about you? I get that you've got your feet back now, but a fish tail's totally different, right?

[ While he spoke, Majima was running the soft surface of one or two tentacles over Tim's hips and thighs and calves, as if thinking about a thing was to touch them. One of these was his third right arm, smooth and grooved at the tip and always a little handsier than the others. Its explorations were taking it affectionately along the curve of Tim's ass. It was a really nice ass, seemed to be the conclusion here. ]

[blap_blap]

I, you. Really?

[That was weird, right? That seemed weird. So that meant that Majima's tentacles were tasting his feet while he was tickling him, along with everything else? Those tentacles had definitely felt up his weird bull schlong back when they'd gone through the monster mash, too, did that mean that a tentacle handy was kind of like a tentacle blowjob? There were a lot of questions, most of them weird.]

[It would explain their handsiness, though, if it was just that they liked how Tim tastes. Was that kind of bad, though? Did Majima's tentacles want to eat him?]

That's. Okay, I guess. Wow. Oh, god, does our floor taste bad?

[He used cleaning products on that floor, was it like sticking soap in his husband's mouth??]

[Tim allowed the tentacles to feel up his hips and thighs, mostly because he was pretty used to his husband's wandering hands, so wandering tentacles were just, like. The upgraded version of that. Triple the handsiness for the same price. One of them was getting very frisky, but, look.]

[Things ended pretty great the last time he let Majima get frisky with tentacles, so don't fucking judge him, man.]

Uh, yeah, it is? I haven't really tried it out, though. I've just kind of sat in the bathtub when I start to feel dry.

[justbeingknife]

[ oops all tentacles ]

[justbeingknife]

[ Afternoon in August, and rain was falling in a light drumbeat down on the roof -- the kind of day when no one expected to get much done. Majima set a little tray of tea and cookies on the table next to Tim and planted a kiss on the bullman's temple. ]

Hey. Feel like a snack?

[ And yeah, ordinarily Tim might be the snack. But let no one say that crime werewolves didn't support the struggle when it came to being a published author.

On the nearby sofa, Jaw opened his jaws in a wide, lazy yawn. ]

[blap_blap]

[It was a great afternoon for writing. The sound of the rain deadened and muffled everything else, leaving just the steady patter and the occasional distant roll of thunder. Every once in a while, Jay shifted around on the couch behind him, stretching into a new impossible cat position or letting out a little kitty noise as he yawns. It was... nice.]

[It'd be nicer if he was making better progress on this chapter, but the course of writing never did run smooth. And right now, he was working on something serious-- not just the sequel to his werewolf romance novels. At least with the werewolf novels, if he was stuck, he could always just throw in a gratuitous sex scene to take up space between plot points.]

Oh, hey. [He tilted his head to receive the smooch, angling it so that his horns weren't in the way.] You've got good timing? I'm kinda stuck right now, I should probably just take a break.

[He hooked his fingers into Majima's shirt, pulling him down for a proper hello kiss.] How's it going? I, uh. [He looked at the time.] I guess I've kinda been at it for a while.

[justbeingknife]

[ To be fair, Majima also enjoyed the gratuitous sex scenes. Sometimes they gave him ideas. It was nice. Kissing Tim was even more nice -- warm, familiar, with the bonus chance for this werewolf to ruffle his fingers through his husband's hair. ]

Not bad. Did you know ya get these little frown lines sometimes, when you're thinking? It's adorable. [ Not that he ever watched Tim write or anything. Especially not when the bullman got himself absorbed in the process. ]

You should definitely stretch out for a bit. Get your blood circulatin' again.

[ There was more than one possible meaning to this comment, but for once, Majima seemed to be going with the one that didn't end with feverish makeouts. Maybe he wanted Tim to have the chance to appreciate today's snacks: peanut butter cookies in the shape of sea turtles, and clearly homemade. ]

Maybe tell me where the story's going so far?

[blap_blap]

I do?

[He rubbed at the spot between his eyebrows, like he could feel the frown lines there. Was he getting wrinkles? He wasn't that old, but stress wreaks some serious hell on your complexion.]

When did the botox wear off? Has that been invented here? Man.

[Worries for another time. Right now, he has a husband with cute cookies and tea to pay attention to, that was a way better use of his time than trying to track down a doctor who'd inject his face with bacterial toxin.]

Oh, right, yeah. Uh. Remember when I told you about that book I wanted to write? The one about the Corporate Wars? [The one that would've totally gotten his kneecaps bashed in if he tried to publish it in his Crapsack Universe.] I'm trying to, like, rework it. I don't have to be as careful about hiding what it's about, since, uh, Hyperion's not gonna show up on my doorstep and make me disappear under mysterious circumstances here?

[Technically, Jack could probably still take offense about it, but Tim's not super worried about that just because of the fact that Jack doesn't read if he doesn't have to.]

[justbeingknife]

Botox?

[ Majima hadn't yet been schooled on the particulars of this miracle cure, but he took the opportunity to sneak a kiss to Tim's forehead, minding the curve of his horns. ]

Yeah, I remember. I remember wondering how the hell it could've gotten that bad. But if anything, that just makes me more curious to read it.

[ Jay, ever intent on absorbing all the attention, had gotten up from his sprawl on the couch to walk along the very edge, where Majima had leaned a hand. Now the cat placed a paw over the back of that hand. The werewolf lifted his hand, and placed it over the cat's paw. ]

Now that I think about it, I bet it'd have a built-in audience in Bavan, too.

[blap_blap]

Oh, uh, it gets rid of wrinkles? By like paralyzing bits of your face or something.

[So basically something that Jack had injected just all over his face. Man could barely move his eyebrows for a while, but he looked ten years younger.]

[Jay pulled his paw from underneath Majima's hand and, again, set it on the back. This could go on for some time.]

If I could figure out what the hell I'm doing with this scene, may you could someday. [He sighed.] Writing is hard.

[Too bad, Tim, you're the one who wanted to be an author so bad. You made this authorial bed, now you get to die smothered by writer's block.]

You think? I mean, society's descent into end-stage capitalism is a kinda heavy topic.

[justbeingknife]

What? Like injectin' pufferfish toxin into your face?

[ It didn't come as a huge shock that Jack would be into some weird shit, but it still took Majima by surprise every now and then when it rippled over into Tim's life. He set his hand on Jay's paw, one of his ways of playing with the cat. ]

Yeah. First, you're a monster, so there're people who'll eat the multidimensional angle up. And then ya have all the people who live in Bavan who don't get a nice piece of the pie, the ones who have to watch the old money look down on 'em in real life.

I think they'll read it and see satire. Like RoboCop.

[blap_blap]

I think it's from like a fungus or a bacteria or something? But yeah, you got the idea.

[Tim's weird bleed-over from Jack occured in many and varied ways, none of which he liked. At least the botox wore off after a while, and he technically didn't need it because he still had the collagen production of a twenty-something year old, but the face of a thirty-something. He was just going to look thirty-something for a very long time.]

[Majima made a few good points about the general appeal of his dystopian hellscape of a novel, which was... kind of heartening. It was nice to think that people would want to read it, even if it was depressing and had a bit of a downer ending.]

Yeah, I guess. But the robot cops in my book don't discover their humanity and take down the evil corporate man. [He huffed out a laugh.] Hey, so, y'know, back at Hyperion? Any of the loaders that started showing, like, a personality or too much intelligence would get scrapped. The idea that the loaders could become sentient freaked Jack out a lot.

[justbeingknife]

Really? How can he stand bein' a robot?

[ Though Majima supposed he didn't have much choice about it. Jay meowed at him, so Majima bent down and rubbed behind the cat's ears.

He slid onto the sofa and patted his thigh, invitation for Tim to come join him. ]

Never really gave the idea of robots much thought past sci-fi movies. But there're people here who used to be one, right? And I figure they have as much right to exist as anyone else.

[blap_blap]

Denial, mostly. He doesn't think he's really a robot, because he's got a human brain in there. Thinks he's more like... a cyborg.

[Well, if Majima's going to pat his thigh, don't mind if he does-- Tim'll just appropriate that lap space for himself. The perks of being married, he gets to sit in the hot crime man's lap whenever he wants.]

Yeah, I'm generally kinda pro-robot rights? For sentient ones, I mean, I'm not talking about emancipating toasters or something. But it would be hard to draw the line about like. Where a robot goes from being a thing to a person?

[Let's take Complicated Existential Questions for 1000, Trebek. Answer: A miserable little pile of secrets.]

[justbeingknife]

A brain in a robot jar? Sounds worse. [ Majima was going to file that little bit away, though. Never knew what it could come in handy. ]

[ He gave Tim another smooch as the bullman settled in. More chance to cuddle with the man he'd married? Yes, please. ]

How about... when they say they are? But I suppose you could just program 'em to not be able to. [ It would also be much more profitable to do so if, y'know, you were a horrible tech tyrant. ]

Seems like somethin' we ought to figure out if we don't want to get our asses kicked in by time-traveling robots. Comfortable?

[blap_blap]

Or, y'know, if you don't want to get your ass kicked in the inevitable robot revolution. That's a thing that could happen, no time travel necessary. But, hey, we're robot sympathizers, maybe we'd be spared in the rebellion.

[If the loader bots ever truly gained sentience, that's probably what would happen at Hyperion. The robot uprising, with a bunch of canary yellow loaders telling you how uncool you're being in their flat robot voices. And after Jack's death, the bots did seem to get smarter, though perhaps everyone got a little smarter after that.]

Yeah, I am. This is prime real estate, after all.

[This was some high quality lap. In fact, Jay might be getting a little jealous about the lack of lap space that he was currently occupying, and started to move his bulk towards climbing onto Tim's lap. Just stacking everyone up on this one crime man.]

Oh, come on, Jay, there's not enough room. [That didn't matter to Jay's tiny cat brain. GIVE HIM THE LAP.]

[justbeingknife]

I was gonna say, it comes with a great view.

[ You know what? This was fine. Even if Jay didn't understand that two objects couldn't occupy the same point in space and sometimes slapped monsters in the face when they weren't quick enough to get up and refill his kibble.

Majima planted a kiss right on the edge of Tim's collarbone. The cat slid off of Tim's leg and then headbutted it like the furry dummy he was. Like, this would somehow open up more lap capacity, right? ]

That reminds me. I got a call back from that vet. They said if we can trap the cats from the barn, they got plenty of time in their schedule.

[blap_blap]

[There were few places that Jay Catsby couldn't bully his way into, considering that he's twenty pounds of furry idiot. He managed it in the mornings, when he would swat at Majima's face until he got up to refill his kibble and then stole the coveted warm spot, sprawling across the crime man's pillow like the ungrateful creature that he was.]

[Really, he's lucky that Tim loved him so much, otherwise he'd still be out on the street, a horrible fat street tom instead of a horrible fat spoiled housecat.]

Oh, good. [The barn was just chock full of cats of varying degrees of feralness, most of them still... intact. There was yowling. There were probably going to be kittens in a few months, too, which was a problem that they needed to nip right in the bud before they had an actual colony of cats on their hands.] We can set up some traps and start getting them fixed. Y'know, assuming that you don't want a hundred cats living in our barn. We'll have to try to find the kittens in a few months, too, maybe adopt 'em out.

[That could actually be cute! Having a house full of kittens and then sending them off to a good home. For a few weeks, it would be Tim's dream come true-- he could be covered in tiny cats.]

[justbeingknife]

Yeah. That sounds like a plan.

You've got such a big heart, y'know that? [ A big heart, and the tits to match -- what more could a crime man ask for? Tim had a way of melting him in an instant, and this afternoon was no exception. Majima looked up at his husband with the kind of stupid, wholehearted devotion you could never buy -- not in a million years. ]

Hey. This year, let's go somewhere for fall again. Half-year anniversary?

[ Was that even a thing? What the hell, they could make it a thing. ]

We can see the leaves, try out all the latest pumpkin desserts... whatever ya like.

[blap_blap]

I think it's just that I really like cats.

[But he did have big tits, that definitely was true. And like... probably a moderate heart. A medium-sized heart, maybe slightly bigger than average? But, god, when Majima looked at him like he was the whole world, it made him want to be a better person. Live up to absurd devotion written all over his handsome crime man face, be the kind of person who deserved that.]

Yeah, we can do that. I kinda think we can do whatever the hell we want?

[So if they wanted to take a half-anniversary, who's going to stop them? The marriage police? They're adults! They can just do shit and not have to justify it to anyone.]

It is almost pumpkin spice season. [Tim got the dreamy, faraway look in his eyes that millions of basic bitches got every time September rolled around and pumpkin spice lattes came back on the menu.] Y'know that little bakery we got the cherry blossom stuff from? Last year they made one of those roll-up cakes and it was pumpkin spice and the slices were all shaped like pumpkins, it was super cute.

[justbeingknife]

I remember.

[ As far as Majima was concerned, Tim could consume all the pumpkin spice he wanted. Maybe he'd learn how to make some pumpkin muffins or something. Or lattes?? How hard could they be? Especially if his reward was seeing a smile on a freckly bullman.

Hell, maybe he'd even draw dumb little heart in the foam. That was it, that was his next project. This was what he devoted his brain cells to. Also, wow, was it time to give Tim another kiss? Majima thought so. ]

Oh yeah, there was one other thing. I actually bought something the other day. Don't know how much ya like board games, but I figured we could play it if ya ever needed a break. It's got the whole swords and sorcerers thing goin' on, except with little kitty cats.

[ Disgusting. ]

[blap_blap]

[And here we had the Mad Dog of Shimano, learning how to make latte art for his dumb beefy husband. How the mighty have fallen, or perhaps how the mighty have gotten into a loving relationship and never learned to give a shit about dumb ideas about masculinity.]

[And more kisses, gladly returned. Disgusting. Illegal. These two should be banned.]

[But Tim's dumb cow face lights up at the mention of not just a board game, but a magical cat-themed board game. Could it be? Could it truly be the thing that he never knew he wanted until right this second?]

Did they make a Meowthor the Magnificent board game? Oh my god, yes, we're playing it. Can you play it with just two people? I'm not above blackmailing someone if we need more people.