IC Inbox - Ryslig

[blap_blap]

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[justbeingknife]

It's two to four players, so blackmail ain't strictly required.

[ How was Majima going to get up with his lap full of minotaur? By slipping his arms under Tim's back and calves, and simply lifting him up in a bridal carry -- tabby cat included, since Jay was insistent on going all in on coveted lap territory.

Majima made his way to the hall closet, and nudged the door open with his shoulder. ]

Right there on the shelf; it's the wrapped box.

[ Wrapped in little pawprint wrapping paper, within arm's length if Tim reached over. ]

[blap_blap]

Oh!

[Majima hoisted Tim up like he wasn't two hundred pounds of USDA-grade A beef, and though there are a lot of downsides to the monster mash business, his husband's absurd strength wasn't one of them. Jay wasn't as thrilled about the situation, making an annoyed and very insistent meow as he was brought along for the ride. It wasn't, however, inconvenient enough to make him leave his lap spot, however.]

[And there, in the closet, was the wrapped box. Tim reached up to get it off of the shelf.]

You don't have to carry me, I promise my legs work. [Gosh, though, what a strong husband. So sweet, so sexy.] Is it bad that I kind of want to make Juno play this with us, just because he'd complain the whole time?

[justbeingknife]

I know. I just love havin' you in my arms.

[ Terrible. Just awful, especially the wholeheartedly adoring way Majima was looking at the boeuf in question. He'd set Tim down, though, by the coffee table so they could both see what the board looked like spread out.

There were multiple little game pieces, each a magical cat. One was Meowthor, of course, but there were also his little siblings. Each had their own little cape and magic wand, ready for adventure. ]

And yeah, we should definitely make him bring Trash Bag while he does it. She can meet Jay.

[ Who would win in that contest of cat wills?? ]

<kyouken>

[justbeingknife]

Hey, beautiful. Uh... you don't mind if I quit it with the Fourth God, right?

< mrhandsome69 >

[blap_blap]

you're really going to quit? like, totally, 100% done with it?

you're not switching to the fog god, are you?

[justbeingknife]

What?! The hell would I do that for, they're even bigger nut cases than the Fourth!

But yeah. Kinda already did. Like just now.

[blap_blap]

oh thank god

you have no idea how good it is to hear that

both of these gods are bad news and i'm all for ditching them. honestly this whole time i've been waiting for like the other shoe to drop with this whole fourth god thing

[justbeingknife]

Yeah, I don't know. Never really did anythin' awful since I've been here, maybe Elias chilled the fuck out a little.

I didn't mean to worry you. That's the opposite of what I wanted.

[blap_blap]

yeah and the fog god and her maniac posse seem to have taken it up to eleven lately

so i mean even if elias hasn't been going nuts, i just wouldn't have wanted you to get caught in the middle, you know?

but it's fine, you're done with it. i'm really just glad you're done with it.

[justbeingknife]

You're really good to me. [ Better than I deserve, he wanted to say, only what he wanted to say even more was ]

I love you.

[blap_blap]

love you too

hey is this because of, you know. what javert did?

[justbeingknife]

Maybe a little. But it's something I've been thinkin' about for a while -- the way people show up here and just jump right off the deep end. Like they think they'll be monsters forever, no matter what happens, and they just gotta take it. Then they find religion, and it's off to the fuckin' races.

I don't care about the war, and I sure don't give a shit about the Fog God. And to be honest, the Arcade always kinda gave me the creeps.

I know the kid, though. Varian? Sweet, likes cute little raccoons.

[blap_blap]

yeah, i know, this whole god thing makes people lose their freakin minds. and even the people who are still sane can't stop the whackjobs

[Lust is part of the whole Fog God thing, after all, and she's managed to stay normal. But that's not enough of an influence over the true fanatics.]

that poor kid. isn't he, like, a teenager? i mean i always knew javert's kind of intense but i didn't think he'd jump right into something like this

[justbeingknife]

He's fifteen, yeah.

It ain't like this's the first time he's crossed the line. I caught him tryin' to off a guy for hawking fraudulent monster parts. And this one time, he mind zapped this waitress into pressing all up on me. Like he does it all the time, just to make a point.

[ That actually... bothered him a lot, the more he thought about it. ]

But writin' his own warrants, making up his own laws? Ganking someone who made a mistake and callin' it justice? That's a whole new level, all right.

[blap_blap]

didn't he try that whole mind whammy thing on me, too? when he power napped his way into our bedroom that one time

in hindsight, red flag. like, big red flag??

maybe we shouldn't have left the french revolution guy in charge of the prison

[justbeingknife]

Probably not. Although I think the last guy who was in charge's into some torture dungeon shit.

[ So was this a step up, or a step down...? ]

Also, I heard Juno kicked him outta the agency before he left. Anyway, I uninvited him to the house. And if any other Fog nuts feel like coming all the way out here to start shit, I guess we'll have to deal with it then.

[blap_blap]

okay we're doing really bad on this whole prison warden thing. we need background checks or like. psych exams???

and good, i don't really want him to have an invitation to come by. if he wants something, he can send a message. there shouldn't be any reason for any of the fog followers to make a house call, though, right? i don't plan on riling them up and giving them a reason

[justbeingknife]

There was that one thing with the haunted barn. I mean, it's not like I meant to haunt anybody. But neither did Varian.

And if they're gonna start executin' people for undermining the Fog? We're both tryin' to find a way back. And if anyone does, that's gonna deprive the Fog God of followers. There you go, a reason for treason. Or hell, maybe they just want a fresh batch of sacrifices for the home team!

Psychos don't need an excuse to kill people, they can make their own. Even keepin' your head down is no guarantee anyone'll be safe.

[blap_blap]

yeah, i know

it just doesn't seem like there's a good solution other than getting the hell out of here

[And Tim wished they could just get the hell out of here, he'd be out of this universe and into 1980's Crime Man Japan faster than you could say 'Tim you still can't speak Japanese'.]

[justbeingknife]

In the meantime, I'll just have to make sure and protect you.

[ Certainly not the most useful phrases in polite company. ]

[blap_blap]

you don't have to protect me but i appreciate yknow the manliness of that whole idea

[He is Mr. Headshot, after all. Maybe one day he'll protect Majima!! Unlikely.]

[justbeingknife]

Yeah?

[ why was he smiling like an idiot at his computer, lame ]

Well, not to take away from the whole manliness angle, but I hope you're ready for that picnic. It's practically a tradition at this point.

[blap_blap]

i don't know what you're talking about, picnics are totally manly

and of course i'm ready, i've been looking forward to it.

[It'll be a nice diversion from what happened in Bavan, too. Forget the bullshit for a while and just have a nice time with his husband.]

[justbeingknife]

Perfect.

Think it'd be temptin' fate too much to put up some decorations? Y'know, spooky spiders, something like that?

[blap_blap]

yeah probably, but when has that ever stopped us

how much do you want to bet that bavan'll be on fire again by halloween?