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[ Too bad, but at least Majima had fed him a bite of donut. He handed Tim the fork, and got another for himself. ]

Brain parasites, huh?

[ Cue Walter Koenig's, 'Oh, no.' But they didn't have to go there if Tim didn't want to, because while he appeared to be slicing himself off another little piece of cake, Majima was also sort of low-key watching Tim's reaction.

Tim seemed to like sweets, after all.

Although he was curious. Honestly, Majima probably would have led with the brain parasites if anyone asked him about his misadventures. ]

Haven't crossed paths with those yet, although those Kulen bugs did try to make me eat a deep-fried dictionary.

...Hey. Do you like it here?

You don't want to, it was super gross. And I mean, the Kulen bugs were kinda dumb, but at least they just wanted to party? I could've done with less kidnapping, though.

[Tim popped that piece of cake in his mouth and made a pleased little noise; fruit and cake are a good combination, he was down for it. And thematically appropriate, Tim appreciated sticking to a theme. Cherry-filled cake to eat underneath cherry trees.]

[He cocked his head a little at what Majima asked.]

That's kind of a loaded question? I mean, I like some things, but there's a lot of stuff that I'm not super thrilled about, too.

[Ryslig was kind of a mixed bag.]

I like not being on Elpis or Pandora and doing jobs that don't have a, y'know, significant risk of getting shot in the everything. I like some of the people that I've met here. I, um. I like you.

[Just in case Majima hadn't figured that out already.]

Not really big on the whole, uh, diet thing? I guess getting beefed up isn't so bad, and I can live with not having feet, but, uh. Yeah. [That.] And I could really live without the crazy Fog God cult nutjobs? There's a lot of kool-aid getting chugged around here, and just... yikes.

So, what about you? You like it here?

This isn't where I belong.

[ Which wasn't exactly what Tim had asked, but what first came to mind, what underlined everything he did here. This place wasn't a vacation from his normal life, with everything on hold until he got back; time was passing, here and back in Kamurocho. His real home.

And even if Saejima wasn't going anywhere any time soon, even if Majima had more leeway than some of the others, culture shock was a thing. Time period shock? Also a thing. Then there were the changes, and the terrorist attacks, and the way that apparently there was no way to die so everyone had seemingly settled into an uneasy, watchful sort of stalemate that surfaced every once in a while to bite someone in the ass. Or kill a hundred people.

He took another bite of cake. ]

Where I'm from, I'd be the last place to say it's perfect. And it's not like everything about this place's bad. Guess I don't know how to feel about it, only...

I think the longer you're here, the less human ya get, and the more normal it seems to just stay here.

[ The important thing was not to let it set in, right? Don't let it set in. Majima looked up to meet Tim's gaze, as if studying his face. In so doing, something in his own expression softened. ]

...I'm glad you're not on Pandora or Elpis. I like you a lot.

That's fair. I mean, I get it, just wanting to go home.

[This wasn't where any of them belonged, if anyone ever really belonged anywhere (which was an existential argument for probably half past never), and they couldn't really be expected to be happy about being dropped into monsterland out of the blue. Their lives had been thrown unexpectedly into a massive upheaval. Tim had adapted to it, but that could have been because he was used to being thrown into situations that involved radical change. Hell, this wasn't even the first time that he'd woken up with a body that wasn't his own anymore. At least he still had the same face this time around.]

[Something in Majima's expression, something around the eye and mouth went soft and Tim's chest felt warm at the sight of it and, shit, multiverse theory was a bitch, wasn't it? Eventually, somebody was going to figure out a way to get all of them out of this weird pocket universe and back to wherever they were supposed to be. And that would suck, regardless of how this whole... hopefully-a-something between himself and Majima turned out. Good-byes sucked.]

For what it's worth, I hope somebody figures out how to send everybody home. Sooner, y'know, rather than later. Nobody deserves to be, god, what even is this? An extradimensional kidnapping?

[But even if someone came up to him tomorrow and said 'I can send you home', Tim didn't know if he'd say yes or not. Sure, he didn't want to live the rest of his life in monsterland with hooves and a tail, but... the longer he was away from his own universe, the less Hyperion would be able to use him to do its dirty work. Maybe his whole universe would just ultimately be better off if he wasn't in it anymore. And, sometimes, when it was like three in the morning and he couldn't sleep and the existential terror set in, he wondered if he wouldn't have been doing the whole universe a favor if he'd just let Zarpedon blow up the moon with him and Jack still on it.]

Same here.

[ He wanted to set things right back home -- if that was even a possibility, if they didn't decide to bring the axe down on Saejima and save the Japanese public even the remote possibility that a dangerous criminal might make it back out on the streets. Not a lot of sympathy for a guy who'd popped eighteen people.

But if Tim went back, wouldn't it be back to some shithole where he had to pretend to be Jack?

And Majima would never see him again...

He cleared his throat. ]

Hey, uh... are you seein' anyone?

[ It probably would have been better to ask this question before asking if Tim wanted to be tied up and fucked but hey. Better late than never? ]

[He sure would have to go back to the same shithole where he pretended to be Jack, at least until Jack decided that it was a good idea to stamp a vault symbol on his face. Then he'd run off to Pandora or something and no one would know what happened to him until hopefully the sequel.]

[But hey, that was fine. Everything was fine.]

[The question was a little out of left field, though, and Tim actually laughed at it. Him? Seeing somebody? Sounds fake.]

Oh, man, it's not often that I could say yes to that question. So, uh, no. I'm definitely not.

[Unless Majima wanted to change that.]

[ He put down the fork and coffee both. ]

I'm not lookin' to overcomplicate your life or anything, but... I like you, Tim. 'fact, the more I see of you, the more I like.

[ Majima trained his gaze on Tim's face, like he could somehow gauge Tim's amenability to starting a relationship in monsterland via some tell in his features. He didn't know what he was doing here, it was probably a bad idea to start something and get attached, only -- ]

Would you be interested in going out? More seriously, I mean.

[ What the hell, right? What had he ever gotten from depriving himself? ]

[To be honest? It was kind of too late, Tim was already a little bit attached. He got attached to people easily, especially people who were kind to him, and doubly especially for anyone who, like. Wanted to kiss him.]

[So, was it a bad idea to start a relationship in monsterland when they were all trying to get back home to their respective universes and success meant probably never seeing each other again? Yeah, probably. Was he going to do it anyway? Yes.]

Oh. I. Yes? Yeah, god, I really would.

[He'd have to be an idiot to pass this up. He could do way, way worse than an attractive one-eyed werewolf who takes him to cat cafes and out to see cherry blossoms and liked to talk to him.]

[Wow, he... felt happy. It'd been a while since he'd felt this way.]

Can I, um. Could I kiss you?

[ Majima's response was to reach out and slide thumb and forefinger along the edge of Tim's collar, grinning at him. ]

I'd be awful disappointed if ya didn't.

[ So have at it, Tim. They were technically still out in public, so Majima wouldn't start anything too steamy, but as he wrapped an arm around the back of that solid set of neck and shoulders, well. Making out wasn't that risque. ]

Well, I'd hate to disappoint you.

[Tim wasn't exactly an exhibitionist, so Majima really didn't have to worry too much about him starting anything too steamy where somebody could just walk up and see them. But just a little kissing was fine. Nobody would get arrested for kissing.]

[He leaned in to kiss him and, well, he'd kind of planned on keeping it relatively tame, but once Majima's arm wrapped around him that went out the window. Tim rest a hand on his hip and maybe slipped it underneath his shirt a little, against his warm skin. The other cupped the side of his neck, just under his jaw.]

[ You know what Tim sort of tasted like? Those sugary sweets he'd just eaten. But that was cool, Majima kind of liked it -- especially by this particular delivery method.

His other hand reached up to play with the end of Tim's hair and, barely, resisted the urge to muss it. Look, it was the gel, okay? And he knew from personal experience that this guy was a whole snack when his hair was a mess.

Instead, he reached up to touch one of those forward-swept horns, slide his fingers along the base and underside as he kissed back. Man, this was nice. Way nicer than anything in monsterland had any right to be, probably. ]

Hey, tell me what else ya like. And when's your birthday? I gotta know this stuff now.

[ Even when he broke, his face remained close to Tim's. Literal kissing distance. ]

[Tim made a little noise into the kiss when Majima touched the base of his horns; it was a little sensitive there, and felt kind of nice when he messed with it. The rest of the horn didn't have much feeling at all, if any, which, well. Tim didn't know much about bulls, but he did figure that you probably wouldn't want to be able to feel much in something that you would use to headbutt another bull with, so.]

[Majima didn't move very far away when they stopped kissing. Tim kissed him again anyway, just a short little peck, because he could and there wasn't any reason not to.]

I guess it depends on what you mean by what else I like? Like, normal stuff, or, um. You know.

[Bedroom stuff. Hanky-panky. The beast with two backs. How he liked to do the do. Insert other euphemisms for sex here.]

And my birthday's, well. I didn't exactly have it this year? It's on February 29th, so technically it's only every four years. What about yours? Did I miss it?

What?

[ Majima bumped his forehead against Tim's -- not hard, though, he didn't want a concussion. Interesting that Tim only seemed to react to the base of his horn; he'd have to remember that for later. ]

Hey, ya should've told me! Although I guess we didn't know each other as well back then.

[ He still probably would have gotten Tim something, though. For his 1/4 of a birthday, what an idea... ]

May 14, 1964. I'm 24.

[ Though it wasn't like Majima had felt much like celebrating the past couple of years. Your brother's in jail forever and your asshole boss only comes by to jerk you around for shits and giggles, happy birthday. ]

And now that ya mention it, both -- but I was thinkin' more if you're the romantic type, if ya like to get spoiled, stuff like that. In Japan, people don't really do the physical affection thing in public, but it seems like you're pretty partial to it.

[1964... Well, that explained a lot. That was... that was a really long time ago. Like, a really really long time ago. Wow, his life had been going through a lot of genre switches lately? First it was a bad sci-fi B movie, then it became a bad horror B movie when he got dropped into Ryslig, and now they were pulling in elements of supernatural werewolf romance and some weird Time Traveler's Wife shit. What the hell was his life?]

I didn't think about it, really. I never celebrated it a whole lot, anyway.

[Because that would've required him to, like, have friends to celebrate with. If he ever 'celebrated', it was by buying a six-pack of beer and a tub of ice cream and watching The Princess Bride like a sad asshole. But it was only every four years, so he could just pretend that it didn't exist most of the time. Avoidance! A totally healthy coping mechanism.]

[But now he knew Majima's birthday, which was way more important. It was coming up, so Tim could actually do something for it, if he was into that sort of thing. Or not, if he wasn't.]

Do you usually do something for yours? Like, throw a party or something?

[As far as what he liked, well. He did definitely like the romantic stuff, he liked this whole cherry blossom date a lot and it was pretty darn romantic. And physical affection, too, when it was Majima giving it, but was that last thing just an observation or supposed to be a hint?]

Am I, uh, being too PDA? I could tone it down, I don't want to make things weird or anything.

[ Majima waved a hand. ]

Meh, it's never been a big thing.

[ Which was a nice way of saying that his birthday celebrations particularly the last few years had been closer to Tim's in tone than might be immediately obvious. ]

I guess there were a couple years when the boys all got together and we did dumb shit. That was fun.

[ He smiled, using the tip of a finger to trace little shapes upon the back of Tim's shoulder. ]

But nah, I like it. We know people from other countries ain't the same. I wasn't exactly a reputable citizen back home, either, so it's probably easier for me to buck the trend. Ain't like anyone was gonna approve of me, anyway, right?

Then it doesn't have to be a big thing.

[It could be a little thing, maybe, if Majima wanted. Just the two of them, maybe a nice dinner and a bunch of those horror movies that he liked to watch. Something that was low pressure and low-key, a nice night that didn't have to be a big production. Maybe, if he was into that.]

[If you asked Tim, though, there were a lot more disreputable people in Ryslig than Majima; other than his predilection for going ham with a knife on punks and thugs, he was a good-looking man with a successful, legitimate business and a charitable streak. That was pretty approve-worthy in his books.]

I guess I shouldn't be that surprised. [His tone was light, teasing.] You did make out with me in a movie theater, like a delinquent.

Yeah? Maybe I'll spend the night in.

[ There was some suggestion in that statement, and also in the little crinkle around Majima's eye as he smiled.

And hey, it wasn't like he claimed to be the biggest, baddest supervillain around or anything. It was just that he'd long ago accepted that he wasn't a good, honest person, because good, honest members of the Japanese citizenry kind of didn't kick people off of bridges with wild abandon or agree to take out hits for the mob. ~~Or betray their sworn brother~~ look, it was fine. ]

And I'd do it again. Kinda like it here better, though. The scenery's better.

[ The blossoms were lovely, and Tim sure could fill out a shirt. So in both senses of the phrase, really. ]

[Well, if that was the metric that they were going by for who's a terrible person, than Tim's pretty high up there on the 'bad person' list, too. Good people don't murder bandits by the dozen. Good people don't send innocent scientists out an airlock because their boss told them to push a button. It was fine.]

Y'know, you keep saying that I'm sweet, and then you go and break out lines like that. I might think you're trying to give me a run for my money.

[He saw what you were doing there, Majima. He could try to say that he wasn't cute or sweet all he wanted, but Tim was onto him. Majima was just hiding it.]

But you're right, the scenery's pretty good from where I'm sitting, too.

[ Tim's death count was a lot higher than Majima's, for sure. But that didn't really seem to bother him much as he leaned in for another kiss. ]

I'm sweet to you.

[ That seemed legit, right? He did seem to have a big old soft spot for beefy dudes that liked cats. ]

And as it turns out, I like takin' care of people. So if that's your thing, you're in luck. And if it's not... well, I could try not to.

[ Tim seemed to enjoy it, though. Aftercare, affection, getting asked out. Majima, if he was being honest, sort of looked forward to teasing out what else he could do for the guy. ]

I'm glad I met ya.

[Majima could have as many kisses as he liked; Tim certainly wasn't going to refuse him. He was a neverending kiss dispenser, so long as the person asking for them was named Gorō Majima.]

[And if Majima's great weakness was beefy men who liked cats, then Tim was glad that he very firmly exemplified both of those qualities. He was the beef, and he loved cats.]

I definitely don't hate it.

[Tim liked that Majima thought about him and about what he might want or need. That was about it, really-- he liked that Majima cared enough about him to want to do things for him. It was a low bar, probably? But that was fine. Majima was passing it easily.]

[And, oh. Talk about saying sweet things.]

I'm... god, I am, too. [Maybe he shouldn't be as pissy at the Fog God as he usually is-- without her bullshit, how would he have met Majima?] ...We had the weirdest freakin' meet cute, though.

'Meet cute', that what they call it?

[ Pardon him while he reached over to trace the edge of one cowlike ear. It just looked sort of velvety-soft, and so sue him, Majima was curious how it'd feel between his fingers. Hopefully, Tim didn't kick him or anything. The tips of his fingers were a little rough -- calloused, from his time spent fighting -- but the touch itself was a gentle one. ]

I didn't know what to think of ya at the time. Or even about all this monster stuff.

[ A brief pause, as he considered. ]

Actually, I haven't dated anyone seriously for the past couple years. So, uh... we're kinda even?

Sure, in rom coms.

[Not that their meeting had exactly been something out of a romantic comedy, unless it was a really weird one.]

[Tim's cow ears had a smooth coat of fur on the outside but were soft and fuzzy on the inside, and very sensitive; Majima's finger traced over the edge of one of them and it flicked in response, just on reflex. He wasn't really used to the idea of his ears being able to move, like, independently, so it was just a weird sensation in general.]

Hey, that tickles.

[It wasn't bad, Tim was ticklish in a lot of places, just not usually the ears.]

[Thinking about when he'd first showed up, though, headless and confused? Yeah, that was a bad time. Zero out of ten, did not recommend. Actually, probably more like negative ten out of ten, because his head had apparently been put in Jack's house.]

I mean, I can't blame you there? I was headless and getting the shit kicked out of me. I guess I was just lucky that you showed up and not someone else.

[Somebody who would've been less sympathetic and more willing to join in. But hey, it was at least kind of romantic that he'd gotten rescued by the guy that he'd end up dating, right?]

Yeah, I think we're even. I, uh, haven't exactly been active on the whole dating front for a long time, either.

[Not that it was all that surprising that the nervous, awkward dude would be terrible at scoring dates with anybody, women or men.]

[ Oh no, how cute. Majima released Tim's ear, since it seemed to have a mind of its own, but ]

Good tickles, or bad? They're soft.

[ He totally wanted to feel more of that velvety fuzz.

In Majima's case, the problem was one both of time and opportunity. He hadn't had a lot of time back during his tenure at the Grand, and... actually, maybe if he hadn't been so completely oblivious, maybe he would have seen what was unfolding right in front of him. ]

Maybe people just don't get to know ya? You've got a lot of good points -- can't imagine they'd miss 'em if they looked.

[ Points that, honestly, had nothing to do with his BMI. ]

Want me to feed you some more sweets?

It's not bad, it just kind of feels weird?

[He'd never had ears that were quite so big and sensitive before, or... so furry? Or mobile? It was especially weird to find out that, sometimes, when he was really happy or excited and wasn't paying attention, his big stupid ears would wiggle.]

[And, well, apparently now they were on the whole dating thing. Okay, that was fine, just the good old standby of I'm sure you have a great personality. Nobody ever mentioned that the problem of relying on just a good personality was that you had to convince people to look twice at your ugly ass, and that was pretty damn hard.]

[So, sure, Tim wasn't really happy with the fact that he had the face of a douchebag, but he had to admit that a lot more people had taken notice of him after he got the douchebag face than before, so.]

Yeah, sure, that's probably it.

[But, hey, who wanted to talk about those kinds of insecurities, anyway? Besides, it wasn't like Tim could ever get his old face back anyway, so he might as well just agree with Majima and let the whole thing go. Eat some cake instead.]

Y'know, I would. I think I'm up for some more of that cherry cake.

[ Majima tilted his head at this -- more nervousness? History? Hard to tell sometimes.

So instead of pressing, he carefully cut a tempting sliver of cherry cake and filling, one hand braced under the fork to catch any crumbs, and leaned in with it. ]

Careful.

[ If nothing else, he appreciated the opportunity to, for once, be able to spend some time with someone he cared about without buildings being on fire in the background. That. Was nice. And he was going to savor today for that alone. ]

IC Inbox - Ryslig

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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, TIMOTHY LAWRENCE. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 011.11.201.45 * mrhandsome69 has joined 011.11.201.45 <USERNAME> First sentence of message. <BANNED USER> SCREENED MESSAGE. UNSCREEN? Y/N -- sample for when you ban someone <USERNAME> First sentence of message. <USERNAME>** First sentence of message.